Rape Is Rape!

I just got off of a coaching call that ripped at my heart. The woman told me that I can share her story because she hopes that it might help other women.

Background: Shelly (not her real name) has been married for nine years and wants to file for divorce but is not sure that she should. Her husband has convinced her that she is wrong about being upset about what happens in the bedroom.

Shelly and Dan (not his real name) have two children ages 2 and 6. After their last child was born, Shelly had some health issues that kept her in the hospital for two weeks. The day she came home, Dan demanded sex. Shelly told him that she was in pain and that sex was not possible. Dan forced her to have sex and she ended up back in the hospital for another week.

Since that time, Dan has forced Shelly to have sex on more than 20 occasions after she said, “No.” Dan has told her that she has a “wifely duty” to have sex whenever Dan wants it. He has told her that when couples are married, forcing sex is not rape.

There are many sites on line that offer information regarding rape. The verbiage is different but the messages are the same. According to Merriam Webster, rape is defined as “unlawful sexual activity and usually sexual intercourse carried out forcibly or under threat of injury against the will usually of a female or with a person who is beneath a certain age or incapable of valid consent.”

If you are in a situation similar to Shelly’s, you are being sexually abused and need to seek help. You are in charge of your body. Please. Do what it takes to stay safe.

Photo: sboneham