My previous post spoke about the need to forgive your ex in order to move on with your life. If you admit that you made a mistake in marrying the wrong person in the first place, it is a valuable first step for so many reasons.
Why does admitting that mistake help?
Admitting that first mistake will help you understand and deal with so many things in the aftermath of a broken marriage.
If for example, he didn’t parent well when you were married, you shouldn’t be surprised that he doesn’t parent well after the divorce. If he was unkind to you during your marriage, he will be unkind to you after you are divorced. If he was petty and vindictive when you were married, expect to see the same thing after the marriage ends. If he lied to you during the marriage, don’t expect that he will suddenly be honest with you or your children now that you are not married.
That shouldn’t come as a surprise. As the old saying goes, “Leopards don’t change their spots.”
I coach so many women who are shocked at many of the things that their husbands are doing during and after the divorce process.
If you married a heel, you divorce a heel. If he didn’t have a conscience before, he won’t suddenly acquire one. If he wasn’t compassionate before, why are you surprised that he shows no compassion now?
Why divorce is like income tax
The reasons are simple.
In both cases, you are giving up money and in both cases you are not happy with the process. In addition, you need to understand that if he cheated or stretched the truth on income tax, he will cheat or stretch the truth during the divorce process.
Photo by iowa_spirit_walker
