Every time you see a child on a computer or cell phone please realize that a bullying could be involved. How would you feel if your child or a child you know was literally bullied to death and you didn’t do anything to help when you found out about it?
Forget the old adages like: Children will be children. If you ignore it, it will go away. Words can’t hurt you. Just pick yourself up and walk away. Sticks and stones… Be a man about it. Turn the other cheek.
Parents, what do you know about bullies in 2009? Are you aware of the fact that according to Dr. Joseph Wright, the lead author of the American Academy of Pediatrics Policy Statement “The biggest misconception in this country is that bullying is normal behavior. That this is just kids being kids and that it really is no big deal.” Dr. Wright also cites a study that found that in two-thirds of school shootings – from Columbine to West Paducah, Kentucky – the shooters had been repeatedly bullied. In addition, the American Academy of Pediatrics says doctors, parents and teachers shouldn’t just focus on the bully and the bullied. They should target the bystanders who witness the bullying.
Since many of us grew up with statements like, Sticks and stones can break your bones but words can never hurt you! Sadly in the case of bullying, that is not true today! Why? In my opinion, the ability to bully has been amplified because of the internet and cell phone usage among kids. It wasn’t of the magnitude when we were young that it is today.
I believe with all of my heart that there is not a single adult out there who wasn’t the victim of a bully at least once. To each of you I say one time is not so hard to deal with. It’s the one time multiplied by ten or a hundred each and every day. This not only destroys self esteem, it causes depression and in the worst case can cause a child to take his or her own life or the lives of others just to escape the bullies.
Teachers, schools, parents and all kids need to have a zero tolerance for bullying. If they see it happening or hear of it happening, they have to step in immediately and DO SOMETHING to stop it! The American Academy of Pediatrics is including a section on bullying in its new recommendations for pediatricians. Those recommendations include: encouraging counseling for children and their families, treating violence related problems and increasing parents’, administrators’ and teachers’ awareness of bullying.
In my opinion http://www.safeyouth.org
is a great site that offers information and help. I am going to share some of the information taken directly from that site.
“Bullying Facts and Statistics
Prevalence
Almost 30% of youth in the United States (or over 5.7 million) are estimated to be involved in bullying as either a bully, a target of bullying, or both.
Male vs. Female
Bullying takes on different forms in male and female youth. While both male and female youth say that others bully them by making fun of the way they look or talk, males are more likely to report being hit, slapped, or pushed. Female youth are more likely than males to report being the targets of rumors and sexual comments.
Risk Factors for Bullying Behavior
While many people believe that bullies act tough in order to hide feelings of insecurity and self-loathing, in fact, bullies tend to be confident, with high self-esteem. They are generally physically aggressive, with pro-violence attitudes, and are typically hot-tempered, easily angered, and impulsive, with a low tolerance for frustration. Bullies have a strong need to dominate others and usually have little empathy for their targets.
Children and teens that come from homes where parents provide little emotional support for their children, fail to monitor their activities, or have little involvement in their lives, are at greater risk for engaging in bullying behavior. Parents’ discipline styles are also related to bullying behavior: an extremely permissive or excessively harsh approach to discipline can increase the risk of teenage bullying.
Risk Factors for Being Targeted by Bullies
Children and youth who are bullied are typically anxious, insecure, and cautious and suffer from low self-esteem, rarely defending themselves or retaliating when confronted by students who bully them. One study found that the most frequent reason cited by youth for persons being bullied is that they “didn’t fit in.” Males who are bullied tend to be physically weaker than their peers.
Long-term Impact on Youth There appears to be a strong relationship between bullying other students and experiencing later legal and criminal problems as an adult. In one study, 60% of those characterized as bullies in grades 6-9 had at least one criminal conviction by age 24.
Bullying can lead the children and youth that are the target of bullying to feel tense, anxious, and afraid. It can affect their concentration in school, and can lead them to avoid school in some cases. If bullying continues for some time, it can begin to affect children and youth’s self-esteem and feelings of self-worth.
Effective Programs
Effective programs have been developed to reduce bullying in schools. Research has found that bullying is most likely to occur in schools where there is a lack of adult supervision during breaks, where teachers and students are indifferent to or accept bullying behavior, and where rules against bullying are not consistently enforced.
While approaches that simply crack down on individual bullies are seldom effective, when there is a school-wide commitment to end bullying, it can be reduced by up to 50%. One approach that has been shown to be effective focuses on changing school and classroom climates by: raising awareness about bullying, increasing teacher and parent involvement and supervision, forming clear rules and strong social norms against bullying, and providing support and protection for all students. This approach involves teachers, principals, students, and everyone associated with the school, including janitors, cafeteria workers, and crossing guards.”
Parents, please spread the word to every adult and child you know with this message:
Stand up to bullies. Take a stand against bullies. Don’t stand for bullying. Do something about bullies!
