Did you know that internet dating may not be so harmless! Many women become vulnerable during and after the divorce process. Often times they have lost their confidence and consider themselves to be without value. They become ripe for the picking of the internet carnivores who stalk women with low self worth. There are a few guidelines that all women should follow. These principles apply to all potential relationships which include blind dates, internet dates and chance meeting dates. It should go without saying, that single or almost single women should implement extreme care, concern and caution. Often, they are willing to kiss frogs in order to find their princes. The problem is that, all too often these days, the frogs that they are willing to kiss are poisonous!
- If you see a red flag, beware! Don’t hope your concerns away. Too many women ignored the red flags when they married their ex-husbands. Now they need to learn from their mistakes. If anyone says or does something that doesn’t ring true, it probably isn’t. When your inner alarm goes off, don’t hit the snooze button. Hit the dismiss button!
- As scary as it sounds, if you have children, there is the possibility that the wonderful date might be interested in your young children. Do not take this lightly and don’t put your head in the sand. What you don’t know may hurt your children.
- Watch what he does, not what he says. Be aware of actions that vary with different situations and people. An example might be the following: You have spoken several times and he has shown you kindness, respect and empathy. You go out to dinner and he is rude and unkind to the people at the table next to you. He comments on the woman’s weight loudly enough that she heard him. The waitress is pretty and he openly flirts with her. Don’t sweep your negative gut feelings under the carpet. The lump under the rug, will eventually trip you and you WILL fall.
- Be aware that people on the internet do not always depict themselves as they really are. A man who says he is 5’6″ is often 5’2″. He may say he is of average weight but in reality he is a heavy weight. A man may say he is forty and could be any age from 20 to 90!
- If someone tells you that he is a lot younger than you, he may be after something different from what you have to offer. Remember also that some of the singles around the internet, are not really single. Note the times he speaks or emails you. He might be a “happily married hubbie.”
- Remember that what goes up must come down. Don’t waste his time or your time if he isn’t what you are looking for. It’s often difficult to say that you aren’t interested. Many women avoid problems (they think) by not answering his calls or by always having a prior commitment. It’s best to be honest and kind in the way you tell him you aren’t interested. Please, do not say that you just want to be friends. It may sound kind to you but it is insulting to a man.
- Don’t assume that just because you are looking for a serious relationship, that he is too. Think about what teenage boys have on their minds all of the time and remember that your dates are teenage boys with a few more years on them.
