Dramatic…yes! Reality…yes!
Well, the recession might be lowering the divorce petitions but it sure hasn’t changed the number of emails that I have received in particular from stay at home moms.
It continues to break my heart to hear the stories from wives and mothers who have been cast aside and had not protected themselves prior to becoming stay at home moms. Several of you have requested that I re-post the following post from October of 2007.
So, here it is:
I have received a few comments from women and men, who have gotten the impression, that I am husband bashing. Oh, contraire! Just like everything in this world, there are good husbands and bad ones. On the same note, there are good wives and bad ones.
That said. I do feel the need to reiterate my objectives once again. My book, To Have And To Hold Hostage…Divorce For Stay At Home Moms: A Unique Guide For Women Facing Divorce and this web site, are places where support, information, a listening ear and a place to vent, are offered to all women in the throws of divorce but especially stay at home moms.
The support comes by way of suggesting and helping these moms prepare for possible divorce. We also want to help them to be prepared for what might be the saga of a divorce that has already begun. By offering to stay at home moms, a different way of thinking, We hope to help them to avoid some of pit falls that many of us had to endure. Stay at home moms are in a vulnerable position.
I liken the stay at home mom’s quitting her job to the following scenario: A happy family, enthusiastically walks up the gangplank and onto the deck of a luxury ocean liner. As they board, the crew hands out life jackets. The father is given a life jacket and the children are given life jackets but for some odd reason, the crew doesn’t give a life jacket to the mom. She is so busy, making sure that her husband’s and children’s life jackets are fitted properly, that she doesn’t realize that she wasn’t given one. Neither the crew nor her family notice this important detail either.
Later, after the ship leaves port, the family heads toward their cabin. Suddenly, the family hears sirens blaring and the ship begins to list. The ship is sinking. Mom immediately helps the children on with their life jackets. Dad puts on his life jacket and takes his wife’s hand. OOPS! Where’s Mom’s life jacket? Oh, well! It’s too late now! Mom will just have to make the choice to sink or swim. Get the drift?
[…] who divorce are more vulnerable to poverty because unlike northern and western Europeans, there is no “insurance” for the women who took time off to raise the children. In addition, they often receive less than […]
[…] news of this sinking ship brings my memory back to a post I wrote a while back. In the post, I made an analogy about stay at home moms and sinking […]