Even though you are up to your eyebrows in divorce, please be aware of what your children might be going through.
Is your child the target, the delinquent or the spectator?
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention says that suicide is the third leading cause of death in fifteen to twenty four year olds, surpassed only by accidents and homicide. Suicide is the third leading cause of death for young people aged 15 to 24 and the fourth leading cause of death for children between the ages of 10 and 14.
When we were young, elementary school consisted of classes, lunch and recess. We played sports and had winners and losers. Now, there are no winners or losers. Everyone must be a winner. We played games like dodge ball. Dodge ball isn’t played anymore because it is seen as harmful to the self esteem of the kids who are hit with the ball.
We are deceiving our children by pretending that everyone is a winner and that sticks and stones can break your bones but words can never hurt you. We have tipped the scales and children are reaping the rewards of our idealistic and misguided mission to keep them in bubbles floating above the realities of life.
The fact is that there are winners and losers and there are disappointments in life. Children need to be prepared for those things by learning ways to cope with defeats.
History proves that human nature attempts to correct a problem   by taking the pendulum to the other extreme and often creating a new and different problem that is worse.
Self esteem, blooms with kindness and respect and withers in the presence of bullies. Bullying is a cancer in our schools. Children who are bullied often suffer low self esteem and depression. The system speaks of encouraging self esteem but sadly the system doesn’t nurture self esteem in the children who need it most. The self esteem of a bullied child is virtually non-existent.
You as adults are in charge of the world of all children. You need to own that position and take responsibility for it. You need to understand and own the power you have over what happens in the lives of all children. You need to ask the questions. You need to be aware of what goes on behind the scenes. Bullies can be deadly and you fuel the fire if you ignore the issue or believe that bullies are always in the other schools.
To save a child’s life, you must ask yourself, Is my child being bullied? Could my child be a bully? Is my child laughing at kids who are being bullied? Having a talk with your children about bullies should come before the birds and bees conversation. You must take action. Facing the harsh reality that there is a huge problem with bullies in our schools is the first step in removing their decay.
My mom used to tell me to turn the other cheek when someone was unkind. My dad used to tell me to hit back if someone hit me. That was then. Then I didn’t know of any kids who committed suicide. This is now. Now it is not uncommon to hear that a child has committed suicide. The term bullycide has been coined to describe a child who commits suicide because of being bullied.
Creating a united front is the only way to stop the bullies. There is power in numbers. Who can change the life of a bullied child before it is too late? Anyone and everyone must help.
Creating and implementing an anti-bullies team must be part of the curriculum of every school. Solving the problem must begin in the elementary schools. Teaching more impressionable children is easier than attempting to change established bullying behaviors that have become a way of life. Elementary schools must be at the root of eliminating bullying conduct.
Depression causes most teenage suicides. What can cause depression? There are many factors but a person just doesn’t wake up one day depressed. Statistics prove that depression can lead to children ending their own lives or the lives of the ones who are bullying them.
You should not and cannot make excuses or turn your eyes away from reality because if you do, the result can be deadly. If you don’t think this is a serious matter, read about the fate of these bullied children.
Eric Mohat, 17, was bullied in high school and when a bully said to him in class, “Why don’t you go home and shoot yourself, no one will miss you,” he did.
Megan Taylor Meier November 6, 1992 – October 17, 2006 committed suicide by hanging three weeks before her 14th birthday. Her suicide was attributed to cyber-bullying.
Jared High developed depression from being bullied. He was born September 23, 1985 and died September 29, 1998 by suicide.
Columbine happened because of bullies.
What if your child was the one who died? What if your child was the bully? What if your child just stood by and watched? Ask the questions and take some action.
Please.
Photo by d.billy
