One of the most important things that a woman can do as she faces divorce is to remain realistic. There is a very fine line between being optimistic or pessimistic and realistic. When women are unable to stay away from the opposite ends of the spectrum, they are unable to make the right choices.
Divorce Rules of the Road
- Face the fact that you can’t assume anything about anyone. You must understand that at least for now, that pertains to your attorney, your friends, your family and your spouse.
- Don’t believe any promises that are made to you regarding your divorce. There is not a person in this world who can make any guarantees when it comes to the outcome of divorce. People who say they can have ulterior motives!
A tragic example of this message is one that is not uncommon. Women who reside in non 50/50 states are too often told by their attorneys that they will get them 65% of marital assets. What they don’t tell them is that too often, nobody except the husband knows what the assets are. The question becomes 65% of what or how much?
Which is better to be awarded 50% of $100,000.00 or 65% of 50,000.00? Obviously the answer is 50% of the higher amount. What you need to understand is that you must know what your marital assets are. Do you know how many bank accounts you and your husband have or where they are? Do you know how much is in each one? Do you know about retirement accounts, stocks or bonds? Do you know about liabilities?
Many times women who are in the middle of divorce struggle to find out after the fact what their marital assets are and where they are kept. Other women who are are preparing for possible divorce, try to find out what they and their husbands are “worth.” Many of these women have never attempted to understand anything about the marital assets in the past. Many have not even looked at the tax returns before they signed them.
Being overly optimistic does nothing but hurt your chances of financial survival after divorce.
Please! Don’t be unrealistically optimistic by assuming that these situations do not pertain to you. If you do, you will regret it.
Photo: kenteegardin
